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Thursday, March 23, 2006

Ear air ear

Posted on 4:01 AM by Unknown
Here is more information than you probably want to know. In our view, it is not suitable to those of you who may have a squeamish disposition.
"Different individuals vary considerably in the amount and consistency of their ear wax. There are two types described, wet and dry, which are inherited. Dry wax is common in Asia, while wet wax is common in Western Europe."

Timothy C Hain, Ear wax: What is ear wax?

My left lug'ole is a shriek of tinnitus, and not much of anything else. It's a bit like that "underwater" feeling you get on an airplane, before yawning pops it. Only yawning isn't working, and neither is being surprised.

It's been like this a few days now, but a prescription of 5% sodium bicarbonate ear-drops is promised to unclog the whole thing, in the manner of cleaning a drain. Nice.

The Dr gets the fun job of administering this unblocker, and then having me completely unable to hear what she's saying. My sense of balance is also a bit out, so I'm a bit dizzy as well as a bit deaf. (And I've eaten too many pies recently, too. As we roll merrily on towards our second wedding anniversary, I'm sure she's just thrilled how I turned out.)

My dad, what is expert in these matters (and also an authority on snot), says the bright orange clog is a bit like roof-tiles held together with velcro. The mildly alkaline unclogger persuades the velcro to unstick, and then the whole roof caves in. Looking forward to that, then.

My mum, from who I have apparently inherited rubbish aural passageways, tells me that it'll suddenly all unclog with a strange gurgling noise. And probably drool bright orange gak down my neck, most likely while I'm out shopping or commuting.

So look out for that if you're coming along to the gig on Saturday.

Yesterday I had an unexpected day off, so pootled down to see the best mate, who is back from extensive travels in the east and must now be referred to as Chief Piako. He's not got anyone to be chief of yet, but I've asked about membership. Many stories told and beers drunk. And I bought a new top.

Right. On with some writing things. Or maybe even some lunch.
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      • Beyond good and evil
      • To introduce the guest star
      • The pies! The pies!
      • What pants are you wearing?
      • Nosotros amigos en el norte
      • No speak?
      • Ear air ear
      • Chewing gum for the soul
      • Do look now
      • Stop, look and listen
      • ...and Robert Dick
      • Rabbit season
      • Elephant is dead, long live elephant!
      • An alternative present
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